Welcome to another weekly episode of the NoiseDraft, a completely made up mock draft for your reading pleasure. Each week the topic changes and each week the selection order changes. Feel free to continue the draft in the comments below! Just remember, once something has been chosen, you can’t choose it again!
For some people, a kidney is worth an iPad 2. We tend to disagree. In the Philippines, an the average kidney street price is about $3,000-$7,000 which can buy you quite a few iPad 2s. And if your a black market kidney reseller, then you can rake in about $85,000 for a kidney. Since we at the Noisecast are business savvy enough to know what kind of paper we can get for our kidney, we decided to settle for some items that are a little more resilient in value than just an iPad 2.
The machine that makes Skittles and Starbursts. If I can have that in my home to make as many as I want, I would sell both kidneys and my stomach.
Something that makes endless amounts of beer. Can I sell my liver instead?
An artificial kidney/liver combo with improved filtering. Bring on the booze!
A Replicator. It would definitely save me trips to store where I have to deal with people who insist on using a bagillion coupons to save a buck fitty
A teleporter would be nice. Screw traffic and all forms of transportation combined.
A Proton Pack. That’s all I need to get my lucrative ghost bustin’ business off the ground.