NoiseDraft: Places we could have as our home theater

Welcome to another weekly episode of the NoiseDraft, a completely made up mock draft for your reading pleasure. Each week the topic changes and each week the selection order changes. Feel free to continue the draft in the comments below! Just remember, once something has been chosen, you can’t choose it again!

Killer home theater setups are a dream for almost every geek. Layfolk may call it a man cave but we like to call it a bucket full of awesome. Guy and girl geeks alike have dreams of the perfect home theater. Some have even set one up for a friend or a relative. Just ask Marian. But what if money was no object and fiction could become a reality? What would be your ideal home theater? Would it be Dr. Evil’s moon base? An IMAX theater? A 50s drive-up cinema? We have our picks right after the jump!

1. Agrippa – The broadside of Gonzorider’s booty

A dark room where I invite all my friends and Gonzo moons us as we project the movie on his dunk. Really, the location is irrelevant. *Special note to Gonzo: Please keep junk forward and not tucked back. It’s distracting seeing a ballsack protruding from random locations in the scene.

2. Ron – The Illusive Man’s control center

Dark, ambient, holographic, probably a killer sound system, It’s perfect. Also, it’s in space, which totally rules.

3. Ben – The inside of my eyelids

Bored at work? Now I don’t have to be! Also nobody can judge me for the cheesy 80’s action movies I like to watch. I can just play it off like it’s something classy and respectable. Like The Phantom Menace.

4. Steven – The Holodeck

Yes, I like Star Trek. Fuck you. But the Holodeck is an obvious choice. Why watch the movie when I can live in it? The Dark Knight? I’ll be playing the part of Bruce Wayne. Snow White and the Seven Dwarves? I’ll be Humpy, the eighth dwarf that creeps in the bushes. All my entertainment fantasies will become a reality. As long as one of you bastards doesn’t program a Moriarty character…

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