{"id":6400,"date":"2011-05-15T13:00:05","date_gmt":"2011-05-15T18:00:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/?p=6400"},"modified":"2023-12-13T07:12:45","modified_gmt":"2023-12-13T13:12:45","slug":"noisedraft-tech-executives-wed-bone-to-repopulate-the-planet-with","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/2011\/05\/noisedraft-tech-executives-wed-bone-to-repopulate-the-planet-with\/","title":{"rendered":"NoiseDraft: Tech executives we’d bone to repopulate the planet with"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Welcome to another weekly episode of the NoiseDraft, a completely made up mock draft for your reading pleasure. Each week the topic changes and each week the selection order changes. Feel free to continue the draft in the comments below! Just remember, once something has been chosen, you can\u2019t choose it again!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This week we’re letting our loins do the talking. There’s a lot of successful executives out there in the tech sector, each with different qualities and characteristics that makes them so successful. Take a trip back to Survival Week and put yourself in this situation: the threat to humanity has been eliminated but not without a major toll on the human race. Only two people have survived, you and a certain tech executive. Your mission is simple. You two must repopulate the world and keep the human race alive! Who do you choose to be your Eve to your Adam, or Adam to your Eve, or Adam to your Adam?<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

1. Ben – Woz<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019s so big and cuddly. Like a teddy bear. The next generation would be user- friendly. And I\u2019m sure a genius of his caliber could figure out a way to get around that whole \u201ctwo men having a baby\u201d thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

2. Ron – Mich Mathews of Microsoft<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

She\u2019s a girl. That\u2019s the only reason. I\u2019m not trying to get down with some dude, no matter how awesome he is. Sorry Jobs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Alberto – Marissa Mayer, VP of Search Products and User Experience @ Google<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Because quite honestly we\u2019re gonna have to recreate society as we knew it and I refuse to live in a society where I can\u2019t quickly find a way to search out lolcat pictures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Vitto \u2013 Barbara Carbone<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

She\u2019s an attractive woman, sure. But her name has \u201cbone\u201d in it. Giggity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. Kevlar – None<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Because if we needed to repopulate the planet, we\u2019d need the ones who do the lab work and research, not the figureheads who shuffle numbers all day. Plus, hot sciencey chick is way better than a hot executive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. Steven – Arianna Huffington<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

The world would be a better place if everyone loved baklava, drank ouzo, and had lamb and pig roasts every weekend. Besides, Greeks were already the cradle of civilization once before, might as well do it again by repopulating the world with two brilliant, attractive, cultured, eloquent, intelligent, romantic, adventurous, honest, funloving, sensual, sexual, kindhearted, energetic, amazing, awesome, incredible, perfect, godly, and down to earth Greeks like Arianna and me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Weekly NoiseDraft: Tech executives as partners for repopulating the world! Who would you choose?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":6416,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1794],"tags":[1208],"class_list":["post-6400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-noisedraft","tag-mock-drafts"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/05\/steve-jobs-open-shirt.jpg?fit=400%2C618&ssl=1","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pelghY-1Fe","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6400"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6400\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21080,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6400\/revisions\/21080"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6416"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.friedyoda.com\/noisecast\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}