Kaz Hirai wants to please the ladies. And when he pleases the ladies, he wants to make sure that the pleasing is done right! That’s why the upcoming PS3 controller, the “Vibe,” is being bumped from a Spring 2010 release date to a Fall 2010 release date.

“I want to personally make sure that our product will satisfy the current and potential female market out there. I will be overseeing and lending a helping hand and finger in all future testing of the Vibe controller,” Sony’s head honcho Kaz Hirai said.

The Vibe is said to feature multiple settings as well as a motion controller that executes commands based on hip movements. The pink bulbous head (Ed. note: sorry, it’s just too easy…) will be pressure sensitive as well. Sony claims that this will bridge the game between a men and women when it comes to gaming. So far, reception from females has been fairly positive with one woman saying, “it will now give me great pleasure to use my Playstation 3.”

Three, that’s the magic number. Three is the number of companies competing in the console gaming market. Three is the number of people required to make a crowd. It is also the number of people required for a threesome. Three is the number of Star Wars films there are that don’t suck. Three is the number of boobs Arnold got to see in Total Recall. Three is the number of functional features a man has in his pants. Three is the number of high definition options one has when purchasing an HDTV. However, most importantly three is the number of words this site is based on.

1. Quality
2. Assurance
3. Management

Don’t be fooled, you cannot use these three words together. That would give you Quality Assurance Management, more commonly known as beta testing. This is not a beta testing site. Living in your mother’s basement and getting paid $8 an hour to test out a video game is not prestigious. However, if you use each word individually you get something prestigious: journalism.

The goal of this site is to provide you with real news from the gaming industry. This news is of high Quality, meaning you won’t find any other gaming news wire out there that can provide prime, accurate, and downright interesting content as this site. We provide you Assurance when reading this site’s content. You can have complete Assurance that our content is real and trustworthy. How can we provide such Assurance? If we report it, it must be true. We don’t publish rumors. We don’t publish opinions. Most of the stuff we will publish is available only behind closed doors. Our investigative reporting techniques are guaranteed to impress game aficionados, as well as piss off industry execs who can’t seem to figure out how we obtained our information. Lastly, this site provides Management. Instead of having to feverishly jump from site to site to gather all your gaming news, this site consolidates everything onto one page. In essence we efficiently use Management on your precious time, saving you from headaches and excessive mouse clicks.

The bottom line:: this is a serious gaming site for serious gamers. And best of all, it costs less than a gamer’s attempt to get laid. And you don’t need to worry about Herpes either. This site isn’t funny. It isn’t satire. It’s hardcore. So sit back, visit the site frequently, and get ready to enter a new era of trustworthy journalism.