This morning Propaganda Studios, the developer of the latest installment of the Turok video game series, Turok, made a surprise announcement that the game will feature dinosaurs.

“There was much speculation as to who the main character, Joseph Turok, would be fighting against in this game. Propaganda Games would like to confirm that it is in fact dinosaurs that will be the primary crossbow victims in the game. I’m proud to say that this has been one of the best kept secrets in video game history, better kept than the announcement of GTA IV hookers being modeled after Hillary Clinton,” announced Josh Bridge, Turok’s lead level designer.

Many rumors flooded the internet over the past year on who the baddies would be in the upcoming Turok game. Rumors ranged from dinosaurs, alien robot pirates, terrorists, to Jack Thompson. “Credible” news sources kept speculating that terrorists would be the primary target of the game to keep up with post-9/11 culture, so today’s announcement rained men havoc across gaming news wires.

“I am so excited! I never would have guessed that it would be dinosaurs! I’m getting a rush just thinking about being able to play a game where man dominates nature, instead a mainstream game where it’s usually men playing the role of the bad guys. It was getting a bit demoralizing to play such anti-human games all the time,” says gamer MadRaper79 (pronounced Mad Rapper 79).

Other gamers expressed some indifference to the announcement: “I get a stiffy just from killing shit, so who cares who the villains are? I get the same rush from driving an ice pick through an animal eye than I do from a human eye. Just ask the guy wearing the eye patch sitting with his defense lawyers,” shrugged gamer Joseph Burns from the Orange County Courthouse.

Turok is set to hit shelves nationwide in less than twenty days. Pre-order is available from Best Buy and Gamestop.