Reporting news is an arduous thing. It requires a lot of time and dedication. I have neither. It’s hard enough keeping up with regular news in the game industry, it’s even harder falsifying that news in a timely fashion. So I’m going to take a slightly different approach on things. I’m keeping the funny, and removing the news. Pretty much this site will be satirical commentary and funny shit. To give you an example, two older posts on this site, this on and this one, are great examples of what this site is going to be like. In fact, this site got a bit sidetracked, because that was the original vision. And yes, the original vision was to get sued for slander and libel. Stay tuned. More content. Less news.

Everyone knows that gamers don’t get laid. But what happens when a gamer pays a prostitute $75 for a quickie? He gets Herpes. Visit Game-Nerds.net and get the same end result while saving yourself $75.

Gibson guitars is suing Wal-Mart and every other company affiliated with the production and sale of Guitar Hero 3. In the meantime, Fender is talking about designing a Guitar Hero 4 Stratocaster. It seems like anything with the Gibson name is prone to making stupid decisions, whether it be suing companies for creating a guitar to going on a tirade of drunken Antisemitism.

…rich fanboys. Why spend $4000 on a Crystal-iced Wii when you can get a first class blow job from Ashley Alexandra Dupré? Eliot Spitzer did it…

BioWare told us at it’s dialog production session at GDC:

Deer Mackrosuft,

Next times yous shows XNA kiosx at GDC, plz use Xboxies that wurkz.

kkthxbye

Do you want to tour a major city with 325 horsepower at your disposal? Do you want to get happy feelings when you perform civic duties? Do you want to turn the tables on your childhood and make others chase the bus instead of you having to chase it every day while the crazy busdriver chanted “faster, fatboy, faster”? Well you soon will be able to fulfill these dreams with the upcoming bus simulator! Continue Reading »

Image courtesy of Kotaku

I have a marketing professor who on his first year of teaching at my university got to experience a teaching disaster. He was teaching Principals of Marketing, the introductory marketing course which lays the foundations for all future marketing courses. It was his first time teaching, so he hadn’t found the right way to teach the students the material. When the midterm was distributed, the class average was a 64. He went to his colleagues for advice, and they told him to shift his teaching strategy. Over the next week, he did exactly that. By week two, everyone was in a better mood and back on track. Except for one kid. This kid was not a business major, but a computer science major. He was so upset about his midterm grade that for three weeks (six 90 minute class periods) he spent the entire time glaring at my professor. Kind of like a look of death glare. Continue Reading »

George “Corpsegrinder” Fisher is the lead singer of the American death metal band Cannibal Corpse. He’s also a World of Warcraft player, but he’s no fucking Alliance Gnome!

Don’t need all the features in the SexBox system? The opt out for the SexBox Core System instead! It contains the bare-bones necessities to fulfill all your gaming…eh, pleasures. All for $18.